The Baby Journals

Merry Christmas all!  It’s difficult to write over here very often.  Partly because there’s not much going on, and partly because it reminds me that there’s not much going on.  I honestly just sat here for about 5 minutes wondering what I could say, and I don’t have much.

Only this…last night we were having dinner with some friends and somehow the conversation turned to having kids.  Of course anytime that comes up, I always end up rehashing the story because someone hasn’t heard it before.  That’s not so bad – I’ve conditioned myself to talk about it ad nauseum without so much as flinching.  The sucky part is that when I woke up this morning, I’d had the most vivid pregnancy dream ever.  There was a point in the dream that I actually remember looking down at my pregnant belly and seeing the outline of a tiny foot pressing against me.  I even had the baby in the dream (but for some reason I couldn’t tell what sex it was).  It really sucks to wake up from a dream like that, only to realize that it wasn’t real.  I tried to push it out of my mind.  I didn’t even say anything about it to Jay – of course it made it easy not to because we forgot to turn on the alarm and ended up waking up at 9:00, so rushing was in order.

Anyway, I’ll keep chugging away even if it takes way longer than I want it to.  I’ll update as things happen, of course.  I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas & you get everything you ever wanted!

God Bless,

~Brooke~

That was my ticket number for the free IVF drawing this past weekend. It didn’t prove so lucky for us this time, but the odds were high. The conference, on the other hand, was very informative and answered a lot of questions. It was not a waste of time, although I have to admit, I was really hoping for that free cycle!

After the conference (it was over at 12:30) we had lunch at Longhorn in Jax, then just wandered around the city. Jacksonville Beach was packed. They were having an air and sea show, so the people were out in masses to see the planes flying overhead and the boats in the water. We were planning on eating somewhere by the beach but we couldn’t find a single place to park, so we headed back towards Jax and ended up at the Longhorn. After lunch we went downtown and just took in the sights. We paid $.50 to ride the Jacksonville Sky Way train. That didn’t last long. Check this thing out.

I was totally freaked out being so far up & the turns really felt unstable. I kept getting that “roller-coaster-about-to-drop” feeling in my stomach. Of course, that’s sort of the feeling I have some days about my circumstances in general, but those days end (thank God!). When we finally got off, my legs were so shaky I could hardly make it down the stairs to the car! I was glad that was over. Lastly, we ventured over to The.Jacksonville.Landing. There was a band playing, so we got a fresh fruit smoothie and listened to the music for a while. Then we were homeward bound.

It was a good day all around, but we’re back to the planning board. Next step…job with benefits – most likely Jay will find one instead of me. Y’all pray.

~Brooke~

I ran across this here. Just want to do my part to spread the word!

For anyone who has ever had a miscarriage, struggled with pregnancy, and all things infertile…there is a movement upon us that you might want to join. It’s rather simple actually: a discreet ribbon on your right wrist to signal to others that they are not alone in their struggles.

Pomegranates, a longstanding symbol of fertility, serve as a strong analogy to those suffering through infertility. Though each pomegranate skin is unique in colour and texture, the seeds inside are remarkably similar from fruit to fruit. Though our diagnosis is unique—endometriosis, low sperm count, luteal phase defect, or causes unknown—the emotions, those seeds on the inside, are the same from person to person. Infertility creates frustration, anger, depression, guilt, and loneliness. Compounding these emotions is the shame that drives people suffering from infertility to retreat into silence.

In addition, the seeds represent the multitude of ways one can build their family: natural conception, treatments, adoption, third-party reproduction, or even choosing to live child-free.

The pomegranate-colored thread holds a two-fold purpose: to identify and create community between those experiencing infertility as well as create a starting point for a conversation. Women pregnant through any means, natural or A.R.T., families created through adoption or surrogacy, or couples trying to conceive during infertility or secondary infertility can wear the thread, identifying themselves to others in this silent community. At the same time, the string serves as a gateway to conversations about infertility when people inquire about its purpose. These conversations are imperative if we are ever to remove the social stigma attached to infertility.Tie on the thread because you’re not alone. Wear to make aware. Join us in starting this conversation about infertility by purchasing this pomegranate-colored thread (#814 by DMC) at any craft, knitting, or variety store such as Walmart or Target. Tie it on your right wrist. Notice it on others. Just thought I would pass the word along!

Well, I’m finally ready to share! About a month ago, our good friends T.J. and Kim Thompson took us to dinner and shared with us that they would like to host a benefit concert for us at The Ritz. We were beyond surprised, and so grateful! So now it’s all coming together and I am proud to share that we will be the benefactors of a night of amazing music with some of the most talented musicians around!

A special thanks to Chris Moncus for an amazing poster design, and other advertisement helps! I hope all of you who live anywhere nearby will come out, and help spread the word. I promise, the music will be amazing, and it would help us reach our goal! Don’t we have great friends?!

We are now officially a non-profit organization! So now, if you make a donation to us you can make checks payable to “The Baby Journals”and get donation credit on your taxes. That’s not the “good news” I mentioned in a previous blog, but we’re having lunch with a VIP Friday and I will probably be able to let you know the details after that!